War Of The Words

Hey, Orson Charles. It’s been a tough year so far. How you guys holding up?

“We’re pissed off. That’s our thing right now. We’re pissed off right now.”

Oh. I see. Well, our record clearly shows that we’ve struggled a bit here and there but that’s to be expected, right? What with the new defense, new quarterback, key injuries and suspensions… also, and I mean this in the most constructive way possible, Mr. Charles, we just haven’t looked like we’ve been playing Dawgs football lately and-

“We’re 1-4. We’ve got a lot of fans saying this, a lot of fans saying that.”

Yes, yes, I was just-

“And I mean, we just want to make everybody happy. We want to be happy.”

It’s funny you say that. I’m reminded of a time when I was happy and it just happened to be right after a Georgia-Tennessee game. I had a couple of roommates at the time. Great friends, both of them. Only thing is they’re both big UT fans. Now, I’ve got no problem with anyone loving their team as much as I love mine. I might inwardly reflect from time to time that it’s a shame they love the wrong team, but I won’t knock anyone for it.

As you might have guessed, I’m referring to P-44 Haynes and the Hobnail Boot game. It was just such a cliched sports moment, too; like something out of a movie. And there we were, me and my two UT roommates, watching it all unfold. Coach Richt’s first signature win in his first season as head coach. In Neyland, no less. In front of a hundred thousand orange rednecks. Yes, I understand the irony in a Georgia boy making fun of 10RC rednecks. But, look, I just read an article in Forbes magazine claiming that the poorest person in the Volunteer State is the Tooth Fairy. And, besides, we all know rednecks turn orange in the Fall.

Oh, I’m sorry. Look at me chattering away. You were saying, Mr. Charles?

“We’re tired of walking around the locker room, quiet, coaches yelling at us all the time for no reason, because we’re losing. So we’re just going out there and to get our respect back.”

I’m very glad to hear you say that. Especially the coaches yelling part. Don’t you just love yelling coaches?

“We’re pissed off right now.”

Yeah, me too.